I finally decided to rate this after 2 days, I cannot get this out of my head so I guess that's a good signal
This is the story of James & Sarah. To be honest, I think this is their book, Sam was one character but I didn’t feel him like one of the main characters. I knew, before starting the book the love between siblings was a one sided thing but Sarah confused me most of the time about her feelings for James.
James is sick, you can feel it from the beginning of the book. He was the main character for me, he was the one who needed help when all we did during his life was protecting other people. He is the one who made me cry, he is the one who will stay in my heart forever but just him, unfortunately I didn’t connect with the other characters as much as I connected with him.
He is a guy who is completely LOST. He’s been working to save money for his new life with Sarah, a new life they’ve been planning since forever. They live with their parents and specially their father is one of the worst characters I’ve read about in a book. How someone can be that bad of a person is beyond me.
It broke him, and in turn, he broke us all
But James is Sarah’s savior, as she calls him and he proves that every single time.
Sarah and James are very close, not only in a brotherly way. James is obsessed with her (or in love, I don’t even know how to name it) and Sarah feels like she owes him everything, and she is kinda right.
She has a crush on James' best friend, Sam. Sam is a really nice guy who also happens to have feelings for Sarah (I never felt the spark between them but I was probably on James side as sick as that sounds).
They decide to start a secret relationship to avoid problems with James. Sam is obviously not happy hiding his feelings for Sarah but he doesn’t have too many options.
***If you keep reading from this point you might read minor spoilers, pls be aware***
Their mother passes away and Sarah doesn’t feel anything. For her, her mother is the person that never helped her when she needed it but James it’s very affected.
As the time goes by, Sarah is falling for Sam badly. She meets Liz, Sam’s mother (my second favourite character) and she starts working with her on her flower shop. James doesn’t know any of this, obviously. Sam is still not happy with them hiding their relationship but he knows is best to keep everything secret.
James is not an idiot, he might be sick but he is smart and he suspects something is going on between Sam & Sarah.
”The only thing I want is to make you happy. You know that, right?. Everything I do is because I love you”
And at this point I seriously had my doubts about Sarah’s feelings because she was apparently in love with Sam but some of her thoughts were confussing.
Sam’s quickly becoming my everything. He’ll never replace James, but Sam is exactly what my brother can never be
Of course he’ll never replace your brother and if you really see him as JUST your brother you would NOT compare your brother with your boyfriend unless you have more than brotherly feelings for him!
I understand she has had a very complicated life but I had that weird feeling during all the book, like she had feelings for him… never mind!
Nobody understands me better than my brother – they can’t, not without having lived the life we have. This is exactly why I love him and why, no matter how much I love Sam, I’m not sure I want to completely abandon my brother. Or whether I can.
I want to heal my brother, kiss his cuts and bruises and lips, and save him from what’s happening in my heart
I don’t really want to spoil the end of the book. I do want to mention I LOVED the author writing style and will read her next books. Will I read it knowing how I feel now? Hell yes, it was not an easy reading but I loved the end.
I’ll always love you and make you happy,
If you only say the same.
But if you leave me to love another,
You’ll regret it all someday
Mandy just sent me these alternate endings, pls read them, I loved both. My heart is still aching for James though
BR with Mandy, Soraya & Debra